A Beautiful Blur

Hi Everyone! (:

 

So honestly, I feel like everyone has been giving the MTC a bad rap. I really like it here. Granted, saying goodbye to my family and then walking away from Nellie, Chelsea, and Zac as they dropped me off at the MTC was one of the hardest things I've ever done. But that big knot I had in my chest the days leading up to entering the MTC immediately left the minute I walked away. It was pretty crazy getting settled in, Come to find out, We are not on the main MTC campus but at West Campus which means we have classes at Raintree and live at WyView. Which isnt bad, because we get to walk across the street and stretch our legs rather than feeling like how others call the main MTC; a spirtual prison. I dont feel that way at all. Exccept for the weird fact that im literally right across the street from my apartment complex. The first day was long, and honestly I doubt I could tell you everything that happened the first day because the days turn into blurs, it really is the weirdest thing, and... I forgot to bring my journal with me. Anyways my companion is Sister Pead, she is 19 and from Farmington, or better known as the Lagoon area. We get along which is always a good thing. Im the oldest sister in our zone, most of the sisters are 19. Anyways I really like our district, which means the group of elders and sisters that I go to class with for about 23 hours out of the 24 hours of the day, just kidding (: So the first day we had a welcome orientation or devotional, and class and wow...this is hard to remember, next time I promise to bring my journal! Im not kidding, It is a blur. But ill let you know that the first night in the MTC as I was getting ready for bed, and unpacking and then finishing up writing in my journal, I couldnt shake the feeling that I am supposed to be here without a shadow of a doubt. As all of you know, the past couple months have been hard, and its been great to have that confirmed to me over and over throughtout my time at the MTC. Yesterday I had a really neat experience, Our teacher was telling us about prayer and how important it is. Prayer is so essential to gain a better relationship with our Heavenly Father, its the only way we can know our purpose here on earth is by speaking to him directly. Prayer is seriously a two way conversation with God, youre not just sitting there talking to yourself working your way through things, its like having a conversation with a friend, I promise He is listening. Anyways, throughout the lesson, our teacher had us go outside in the courtyard to pray to our Heavenly Father to have a better relationship with him. So i went down by the little creek in the middle of the courtyard and prayed. I not only prayed to have a better relationship with him, but to know that He is aware of me, that He loves me and that all my sacrafices and everything that I have given up are worth it, that what He wants me to be here, and this is where I am supposed to be. After saying my prayer, I opened up my scriptures randomly. They came open to Mosiah Chapter 2, the story of King Benjamin speaking to his people. It was the first chapter the missionaries ever invited me to read in The Book of Mormon. I then remembered back to when I was volunteering at the MTC for TRC and when the sister missionaries asked me to kneel down and pray with them if my Heavenly Father loved me. I will never forget that moment, because when I prayed and after I prayed to know that, I could feel the Spirit hitting me like waves. It was so thick and strong that I couldnt stand up. This time I prayed, it wasnt much different. I started crying in the middle of the courtyard, and I realized that without a shadow of a doubt that He is aware of me, He loves me, He is listening to me, and that I am supposed to be here. It was a great experience, and then being able to teach about prayer afterwards was so much better than it was before. I know that if we pray to our father in Heaven He will answer. Also we started teaching our progressing investigator yesterday, his name is Keith, we taught him about the atonement and it went really well, Sister PEad and I work well together. We will be teaching him again today (: We met our Branch Presidency on Thursday night, where we had interviews and spoke of obedience and obviously missionary work and our purpose. Afterwards, the Branch Presidency then calls a district leader for each district, two zone leaders, and now a Sister Training Leader. Guess who the STL is? Me. Yup. hah! So now I have to pretend to know what I am doing when Im trying to learn it for myself! I will be holding interviews with all the sisters, and when the new Sisters come in this upcoming week, I will be welcoming them and showing them around and the Zone Leaders and I will basically be holding an orientation for them, I keep wanting to call it being the MAMA DOVE, because of Kaylyn...so she will understand this reference. basically, I take care of the sisters in my zone and the incoming sisters. Its kind of overwhelming, but it should be good...and I get a break from having a companion, not that I dont love her! its just im used to being independent. hah (:

 

Anywyas I have liek 5 minutes left, I promise I am doing great, I havent cried once for those who are wondering. and I am SO BEYOND THANKFUL For the letters, I honestly love them, and im working on trying to write each of you back, but im also realizing that as much time as we have in the day, I dont have enough time for everything I want to accomplish. Its kind of crazy, but I love being here, I love being a missionary and looking down at my name tag and seeing my name alongside Jesus Christ. I never thought 3 years ago that I would be serving a mission, let alone being a mormon. But I absolutely love it. Keep the letters coming, and remember my PDAY is saturday, so write on friday (:

 

I LOVE YOU ALL and miss you! (: