I am about to leave for my mission this Wednesday, and as of this past Tuesday I have been a member of the church for 34 months!
Before I go into my story, I want to mention that before this happened I had a few instances with the church, not many, but enough. In middle school I had a crush on a mormon boy, I had never heard of the church, so trying to better understand him I researched the church a little bit with my friends, which was the point I realized that some of my closest friends growing up were LDS, but they never mentioned it to me, but soon after, like most middle school crushes do, it fizzled out and I was no longer interested. That is, Until my freshman year of high school in my spanish class, a friend of mine brought his book of mormon to class with him and let it sit on the top of his desk, I asked him about it and if I could borrow it. He told me I could have it! I started to read it every night, and then I would hide it in my clothes dresser. Not long after, the book of mormon was nowhere to be found...so I gave up on it and forgot all about it. I now realize that Heavenly Father was planting seeds and helping me to become prepared when the time came.
I was 18 and had recently graduated from high school, I had been dating an inactive member of the church named Brian for almost 4 years. We never really discussed the church or anything related to it until his friend Matt came home from BYU and encouraged Brian to go to church with him while he was home. Brian wasn't too thrilled about going, so I told him if it would appease him I would go with him. I bought myself a skirt (my first ever, not kidding) and we attended sacrament meeting and left soon after that. My first initial thoughts were...I thought it was boring. We attended a family ward, too dry and too noisy were my thoughts. However the whole "passing the sacrament" was more inviting. I had attended a Lutheran church previously where they had sacrament and I had almost felt "unworthy" to partake of the sacrament at their church because I hadn't been baptized, so as the rest of them left and circled around the minister as he administered the sacrament to them, I was left alone in my seat... I stuck out like a sore thumb. Awk. But this time, I thought "why not? go for it." So I took the sacrament and I enjoyed the experience, and even if I hadn't taken the sacrament I wasn't put in a position that would make me feel awkward or out of place for not doing so. However boring I thought it was, it made me feel good. I told Brian I wanted to go the following week but I remember exactly what he responded "Karlie, I'm never going back." so with that, I asked my Jewish friend Kenna, if i could tag along with her as she went with her LDS friend Allison. I started to attend church with them, and this time I attended all three hours. I remember the first Sunday school class I ever went to was mission prep, and they asked us to each bear our testimony. One slight problem though...I had no clue what a testimony even was! I was freaking out, knowing that any minute it was going to be my turn to share my testimony but having no clue as to what that even meant, I think the teacher noticed my obvious distress and decided it would be best that only those who wanted to, could share their testimonies. I breathed a sigh of relief. Not long after, a few days later, two Elders showed up at my dads house. I was with my boyfriend and we were about to leave so I passed them off to my dad. However, a few days after our run in with the missionaries, I started to think about why they came over and their purpose. I started googling the church, which is never a good idea because there are so many close minded people who have a beyond wrong idea about who Mormons are and what we believe, its almost comical. Anyways, I came across a lot of anti-Mormon sites and I remember not feeling good each time I read them, I finally came across LDS.org and I started reading, I felt good about everything I read, not the same dark feeling I felt every time I read the other sites. So I talked to my boyfriend about the questions I had, and then prayed about it. I didn't pray often, and definitely not every day so yes, this was kind of out of the box for me to do. But I prayed about the church, and that I had a lot of questions I wanted answered and that I wanted the missionaries to come back. After saying the prayer I posted a status on my facebook,
which was then faced with a huge variety of comments, most of them not so great..for example the first comment was "eek. mormons?" Also in one of the comments a friend I went to San Francisco Academy of Art University with, commented and told me that him and his friends used to yell Satan at the missionaries whenever they saw them, my response was this; copy and pasted
" yes, there probably are missionaries in Hawaii your age, so id think something would click inside your brain. How would you feel if you were trying to tell people about something good, something you whole heartedly believed in and there were kids, your peers, yelling Satan at you? how would that make you feel.
and on top of that,
those missionaries have to go ride bikes around all day in that Hawaiian heat to deal with ignorant people when they should be out surfing and enjoying the beach."
Its funny to go back and read those things. I was pretty feisty! After that a girl named Jackie who I had competed against in swim in high school with, messaged me on Facebook
Jackie then noticed I wasn't at church on Sunday, so she called me and found out that my dad wouldn't take me to church, so she left sacrament meeting to come pick me up; fellowshipping and friendship in the making at its finest! (: Needless to say, I started to go to church every Sunday and attend all the activities that the singles ward put on, I loved it. I also feel the need to mention that the missionaries did actually come back about two days after I made the facebook post, but I had just gotten out of the shower and I wasnt about to answer the door in a towel, but just my luck, right? All in due time...About a month and a half later, I was at my mom's house and within 5 minutes of me coming to her house, there was a knock on the door. I distinctly remember saying, "I bet that its the Mormon missionaries." My mom didn't want me to answer it because we were about to leave, but at this point, I was excited. I had been going to church and loved it and I wanted to share that with these two Mormon missionaries! So I answered the door, and guess what? Two elders were standing at the door, just like I thought. It was the weirdest thing. I was just so excited to see them! I exclaimed that I had been going to church and I really enjoyed it. I told them that missionaries had showed up at my dads house about two months previous. They asked where he lived and I told them the area, they asked if it was the big brick house on the corner, I responded with a yes and they replied knowing both my dads and dogs name; they were the same missionaries that spoke with my dad months before! I took it as a sign, Maybe most would consider that coincidence or luck, but I thought it was God's way of telling me that I was heading in the right direction, and that was the little push I needed to get me there. That Sunday at church, Jackie turned to me and asked if I wanted to take the discussions. I looked at her and said of course, so we walked up to the missionaries serving in the singles ward and I asked if they would mind teaching me the discussions. At first, they kind of seemed dumbfounded, now I realize that not a lot of people just come up to missionaries asking if they can take the discussions, usually it is the other way around. So, I started taking the discussions and I loved it.I lost myself in the scriptures and the spirit and happiness I was feeling. I had never felt the happiness that I was feeling in my heart before and I couldn't get enough, my heart could hardly contain the joy I was feeling. It literally felt like someone had turned a light on, it physically looked brighter and felt warmer too. I took the discussions all summer. I think I knew from the beginning that this church was the true church and I wanted to be baptized, but I didn't want to fall away. I wanted to know as much as possible about the church before I made such a huge commitment. I was already making monumental changes in my life in order to be baptized and to live the standards of the church. I didn't want it to be for nothing. I didn't want to give up on it, I didn't want the lights to go off and my happiness to be diminished, I wanted my relationship with Heavenly Father to grow. I continued my discussions with the elders, at first I had Elder Blanchet and Elder Logan, after my second discussion Elder Blanchet was transferred and replaced by Elder Selk. So for the rest of the remaining time I was being taught by Elder Logan and Elder Selk. Jackie would come to my discussions too and soon we were all calling us "the team." Honestly I don't think Heavenly Father could have sent better missionaries to teach me or a better friend when I needed the support. After making the decision to be baptized, some friend's backs turned against me...and I don't think I have ever heard the phrase "I will pray for you Karlie." to ever sound so condescending and rude as it did when I had made the decision to be baptized. Its true, Satan works on those who are following Christ's example to be baptized...but it is so worth it!!! I think people often don't realize that we are followers of Christ, but how could they not? It even says so in the name...The Church of JESUS CHRIST of Latter Day Saints. Anyways, I was baptized and confirmed on October 2nd, 2010 in between sessions of general conference. It was a great day, The majority of the time I was investigating neither of my parents were exactly thrilled that I was joining the church, but it was the first time since the divorce that I saw my entire family in one room at the same time. Such a blessing! The happiness and support I felt on that day was overwhelming. I remember after coming out of the waters of baptism and going into the dressing room to get changed, I started crying from the pure happiness and Spirit that I felt. I would never take or regret my decision to be baptized as a Latter Day Saint. I am proud to be Mormon, and I'm excited to make this very misunderstood religion just a little bit more understood. There are times, like within any life, that you're faced with trial and difficulties...I am no different, I had my fair share of adversity as I was preparing to get baptized as well as afterwards. At one point, my dad wasn't supportive of me paying tithing and basically gave me an ultimatum so I lived with the Busch family for awhile and at another point I had invited my mom to one of the discussions where I thought it might be constructive and helpful, but her heart wasn't open and it just didn't go very well. But, I know missions can bless families, and I know that through my service, my family will at least understand my religion better and why I love it so much. They have become so much more supportive and it has been great and I'm so grateful for them and their support now especially when they don't exactly understand it. I am so grateful to those elders who served in Sacramento and who taught me, their influence in my life will carry on into the eternities. I know without a shadow of a doubt that this is the true church, that Jesus is the Christ, that Joseph Smith was a prophet, that he restored the church to its fullness and that we have modern day prophets and apostles who help guide us through our trials in these latter days just as they did in Christs dispensation. I know that families can be together forever and that no matter the path, God has a plan for each and every one of us and He loves us individually and knows each of us by name. I am grateful to serve and anxious to get started, I know there will be hard times, but I know being able to share the light and joy that I experienced with others will make those hard times and those hard days worth it. Most of all, I know its never too late.
If you would like to know more, please read my profile on mormon.org http://mormon.org/me/5RZ1
The Team (:
my family
from left to right:
Elders Erik Brimhall, Corey Blanchet, Kamalei Logan,
and Lincoln Selk
and Lincoln Selk
Love,
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